These "cookies" are supposed to be whole, not a crumble
I really get down on myself when I mess up a cookie recipe. And recently, I've been messing up a lot which hasn't been great for my attitude in the kitchen.
At least, this is how I felt after several botched cookie recipes. (You can see one of them at The Big Cookie Flop )
At first, this really, really bothered me. I was tempted to think that because so many of my efforts were not turning out how I wanted I am not really a good baker. I was starting to think I had “lost it." (what the "it" was I'm still not sure).
For a couple of days I was in a real funk.
These were not even mediocre cookies- they were awful! Plus, they had completely fallen apart.
I’m not even good at what I enjoy. Maybe I should just give this up and move on, I thought to myself. I realize this sounds ridiculous to some people but baking is something I'm fairly good at and it is my stress reliever.
It's a double whammy when the stress reliever fails.
Thank goodness the pity party lasted only a short while. And out of it came a new resolve to learn more and expand my skills and repertoire in the kitchen. I'm even laughing about the whole incident (and the other mess-ups too!)
Then, the thought hit me like a 25 pound bag of flour: I am in a growth phase.
And growing pains are never any fun.
I learned some valuable lessons in the middle of the mess of cookies that didn't turn out.
1. Expanding beyond known and comfortable borders is nearly always really uncomfortable and not natural feeling.
I had long since baked the tried and true family favorite recipes. Many were mastered and the recipe card was no longer brought out. When I began to discover and learn about different ingredients, recipes and styles, the challenge level increased astronomically. It didn’t “feel” as fun. And my confidence faltered as the outcomes were not what I expected.
Uncomfortable and a sensation of awkwardness is natural when going in a new direction.
If I give up because of being awkward, I will never get to where I want to go.
Now, I tell myself- “feeling uncomfortable in this area is o.k. I am learning and expanding my skill set. I will become a better home baker because of this new experience.”
2. There will be inevitable “failures” when pursuing new ventures- even if one has a natural inclination in the areas she is pursuing.
Be careful about using the term “failure” in a negative way.
If Thomas Edison called himself a “failure” we may not have all the wonderful daily conveniences we have today. One thousand tries before successfully developing a light bulb? Sheesh. the guy gets an "A" for effort and true grit determination.
The key is to look at areas we are having a hard time in as opportunities for learning, for growth, for how “not” to do something. It is also important to note that successful people in every field have a much higher rate of failure than non-successful people.
They don’t look at their attempts as failures. It really is a mental battle.
We are not failing when things done turn out.
We are growing.
3. My reaction to failure will determine the scope and influence of my life.
As many a wise person has said, “we are the sum of our daily decisions.” We would like to think that individual daily decisions do not affect the whole of our lives. But our daily decisions turn to habit and habits form our lives.
What will characterize my life? Will I give up when things become hard or failure looms? Or will I get up, face the challenge, get a better attitude about the benefits of “failure” and start again.
I don’t want to be a quitter.
Not in the kitchen.
Not in relationships.
Not in life.
You don’t either.
Keep working after your dreams. It happens one day at a time. One decision at a time.
One mental battle at a time.
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